Mixed Marriage



The other day while I was putzing around in the kitchen, my husband tuned in to Donald Trump making one of his self-congratulatory speeches at a rally in Florida. Given that the mere sound of Trump’s voice, much less the content of his speech, makes my blood pressure shoot up, I decided to hum a tune quietly to drown out the sound.

What popped into my head was an old disco-era song, “How Deep Is Your Love” by the Bee Gees. I had to laugh at the aptness of the tune. How deep indeed must my love be to have abided my hubby’s right wing conservative politics all these years.

Since we met back in the 80s, my husband and I have had many an argument about politics. I liked to call him a right wing nut job while he would tell our friends that I was sad about the fall of the Soviet Union. We were quite a pair. Back then, we compared ourselves to James Carville and Mary Matalin, a high-profile married couple with diametrically opposed political views. Carville managed Bill Clinton’s presidential campaign while Matalin headed up George H.W. Bush’s run for the White House. The two would appear on Sunday morning news shows and argue politics.

As my husband often likes to point out, one would think that our irreconcilable political differences would make us shy away from conversations about politics. However, we are both strongly opinionated, and neither of us likes to back down from an argument. So if a political gauntlet is thrown down between us, a battle is sure to ensue.

The effect of all this arguing about politics over the years is that our children are somewhat a-political. They have seen first hand the pointlessness of our disagreements and noticed that neither of us has ever budged even an inch in the political direction of the other.

Luckily, my husband and I have always found common ground in the important things in life: our children and our personal values, which inform our relationship with each other and extend to our family and friends.

We may be in a politically “mixed marriage,” but we have found that in most other ways, we blend well together. And with the Trump presidency and Republican dominance over government looming head, at least things will never get boring here. Meanwhile, I’ll be expanding my repertoire of corny old disco songs to get me through.



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