Have you ever been fixed up? That is, have you allowed friends to set you up on a date with a person with whom they’re sure you will hit if off? If you are one of those types who attracts the opposite sex like honey to a bee, read no further.
I am currently working on a memoir, and memories have come flooding back to me. Some are painful; others are hilarious. One of them was my bad luck with being fixed up, which could be painful or hilarious depending on my mood. In college, I dated but never seriously. There always seemed to be expiration dates on either his interest in me or mine in him. In our sorority, we had an annual dance called the Fix Up Dance. The idea was to have your sorority sisters fix you up with someone you had had your eye on but were too shy to approach. Alternatively, your friends would find a guy they knew was perfect for you. Unfortunately, neither of these scenarios worked very well.
My worst Fix Up Dance was with a guy I called Bluto. This was due to the fact that he resembled John Belushi in Animal House both in looks and behavior. I’m sure after I had a few drinks, I even called him Bluto to his face. But I’m also pretty sure he didn’t notice because he himself got wildly drunk and started dancing on the table. The only thing missing was a toga. I was kind of insulted that my good friends had seen fit to pair me with this bozo.
But being fixed up with Dreamy Frat Boy didn’t turn out any better. My “sisters” had managed to get this hunk to agree to be my date, sight unseen. I had been worshipping him from afar at fraternity events and football games, where we shared a block of tickets with his frat. But because he was so gorgeous, he felt no obligation to be friendly or charming in any way. All he wanted to do the whole night was find some pot and get high. Quel disappointment.
Despite these cautionary experiences, I myself am always looking to fix people up. There is something romantic about the idea that you might be responsible for the meeting of two soul mates. Indeed, my husband has had some success pairing friends of his, even to the point where they married and are still living happily ever after.
But be careful. You just don’t want to match your friends with a Bluto!